Plot summary (from the studio): A mysterious event from Earth’s past threatens to ignite a war so big that the Transformers alone will not be able to save the planet. Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) and the Autobots must fight against the darkness to defend our world from the Decepticons’ all-consuming evil.
Warning: Spoilers below!
- I usually can’t stand Shia LaBeouf because he has “douche” written all over him. But he’s actually pretty funny as Sam Witwicky, particularly in the scenes with his parents. I hate to admit it, but he was pretty much the only good thing about this whole movie.
- Frances McDormand was a nice addition to the cast, and I had to lol a little bit when the John Turturro character just kissed her and she had him arrested. That was cute/funny.
- Patrick Dempsey CANNOT act! Ugh, he was horrible in this and makes me wonder how it’s possible that Grey’s Anatomy is still on the air with him in a leading role. He might have been “McDreamy” once upon a time, but he’s just gross and annoying now.
- The last, what, 30 or 40 minutes of the film was nothing but action/fighting/chase scenes? That kind of stuff is pretty tiresome to watch after a while. When the robots battled each other, I couldn’t tell which hunk of steel or which corrugated metal hose belonged to which “character”. It was just a convoluted mess. Plus, whenever action sequences continue unabated for so long like that, it merely serves to emphasize how little plot there is in the film.
- Speaking of “plot,” did the one in Dark of the Moon make sense to anyone? No? Okay, glad it wasn’t just me!
Obviously I didn’t go into Transformers: Dark of the Moon expecting a cinematic masterpiece that would be dissected and discussed by film students for decades to come, but I was hoping for a bit more than the hot mess the movie turned out to be. I give it 2 stars out of 5, and am glad I only paid $1.75 for it at the bargain theater!